THE CROSS-GENERATIONAL OPPORTUNITY FOR A COACH

I’ve learned plenty about myself through working in these environments. I had a good toolbox. I felt comfortable with my coaching theories, models, practices, and process; yet, I found myself continually focused on adding new competencies. Now I realize I was working way too hard. While theories and tools are important, they do not make a great coach. It’s a powerful intervention to work with a client for a year and almost never dip into the tool bag that once seemed my greatest asset.

So, if our value isn’t in our tools and what we know, where is it? Ironically, maybe it’s not in the “doing” but rather in the “being”. When I was first making my transition from consulting to coaching, it felt like I didn’t “do” anything in the coaching model. Just asking questions seemed a pretty weak intervention set. Now I reflect on Virginia Satir who said she didn’t really know how she helped people, or Carl Rogers who thought people changed in the presence of unconditional positive regard.

I’ve learned some things about business along the way. I’m more comfortable with ambiguity and understand the value of disruptive change. I’m less confident in my perspective and happy about it. When I need to let go of long-held beliefs it seems freeing rather than de-stabilizing. I read to expand my perspective, and am less driven to affirm what I believe. I under- stand why young people get frustrated with us. Sometimes we don’t get it. Sometimes we don’t try, maybe because we’re so invested in holding onto what we know. I’ve rekindled my interest in wide ranging conversation and experimentation. I’m just a little less careful.